Are you anal?

Yup –that’s a CELL PHONE in the x-ray of this dude. He was caught having it…..ahem* hidden in his rectum. Apparently he was using it to make drug deals and coordinate killings from inside a Mexican prison. Nice.

What continues to amaze me is that even the most “hardened” of men are quick to put something up their poop shoot. So, let me get this straight…..if you stick something in your butt (me or you that is) it’s sexual. BUT, if you are doing ten to twenty –it’s a handbag.

Storage –without shame.

This is where the story got REALLY interesting. It went on and on about how these things are done on the regular bases in prison, and there are a whole laundry list of items that have been yanked out of the rears of the incarcerated. BUT, what has always interested me were the people themselves that are “holding.”

In my mind, there is NO WAY some top prison shot-caller (I watch Discovery) would be caught dead with something shoved up his ass! So….who does.

Here is my Hypothesis:

People: Tom (new dude) and Bubba (shot-caller).


Tom: You wanted to see me?
Bubba: You bet! We need a guy like you in our gang, I like your style.
Tom: Thanks! Whatta’ I got to do? Shank someone? Start a new drug scheme? Oh! I know! You want me to be your 2nd man –enforcing your directives to the rest of the slime!!
Bubba: Ahh….nope.
Tom: Oh. What then?
Bubba: I just need you to hold my phone.
Tom: That’s it?
Bubba: Yup. Here ya’ go.
Tom: ……….sure.
Bubba: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING??!!
Tom: Putting your phone in my pocket.
Bubba: Son –you gotta take that there phone, and tuck it!
Tom: Oh…..OH! You mean…
Bubba: Your ASS -shithead.
Tom: *sigh* -ok boss.
Bubba: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING NOW??!!
Tom: Putting the phone in my ass.
Bubba: Would ya’ fucking wrap it in something!! For Christ sakes man –were you born in a BARN??!!
Tom: Sorry. Hey boss? What happens if it rings….you know….while it’s up there?
Bubba: It will make you pee your leg a little.
Tom: Oh……ok.

FU -prison folk!