1 hair

Ok- this is becoming obsessive! On my way driving to work, I was playing with my face (you bitches do it too) and I came across a single hair. I missed the fucker shaving. It wasn’t a patch of hair, or a line of hairs down my face like a lawn mower would do. No! it was just ONE by my bottom lip..
How did it do it? How would just that one survive? Is it a super hair?
So, I started to play with it. It seemed harder than my usual hair, and upon looking in the mirror, I realized it was blondish (I have dark brown hair) so WTF?
My OCD set in, and I tooled with it insanely all the way to the office. Once there, I was ENRAGED by this fucking hair! I started looking at what supplies I may have to detach it from my person.
ON MY DESK:
Scissors? –too big- no real good angle to catch it.
Paperclip? –what? Gouge it off?
Stapler? –come on!!
I rummaged around for ten minutes….nuthin. I even went so far as to see if two business cards, set together just so, could sheer it off. Obviously I was going nuts.
So, in the end, I realized that unless I went back home, or bought some cheapo razor at the local minimart, I was going to have to make friends with Super Hair.
We talked briefly, he seems nice. We discussed today’s agenda, and how he would promised to lay low as long as I promised to stop fucking with him. We're pals now.

-he has no clue that I’m going to decapitate him around 6 tonight. SHHHHHH….

FU