Time is short
The laws of the land:
1. If you are in a hurry, you will never get there on time.
2. If you are not in a hurry, you could run naked down the highway, and not as much as a retard on a scooter would cross your path.
3. Nobody has ever made it somewhere in 30 minutes…….ever.
4. If you are in a hurry, and you have to get there in 30 minutes….please refer back to #1.
3:15 pm
I just left an appointment, MAX- six miles away from work. I HAD to be back by 3:45 pm so that I could make a meeting with my boss. A meeting I knew was about how I was not getting things done in a proficient matter.
Let the games begin.
3:19 pm
I get on the highway –after being stuck on the side street for dramatically too long. Why is it that every time you see a line of orange cones….it leads to four or five guys by a truck….eating sandwiches? I don’t care if it’s three in the morning! Sandwiches OUT!!
3:24 pm
I have been cut off in the middle lane THREE TIMES! I missed my exit. Just cant get right. Maybe there is a bar at the next one.
3:33 pm
I end up going down a one way street I have never been on. For anyone who knows, this is the most terrifying experience known to man. I can now see my building to the right…but have no fucking clue how to get there.
3:39 pm
I turn right down an alley. I meet a man named Bud, who gives me directions down an adjoining alley. It cost me 2 bucks.
3:43 pm
My boss calls:
Boss: Where are you?
Me: Somewhere south of downtown.
Boss: How did you get there?
Me: I listened to Bud.
Boss: Who’s Bud?
Me: A guy with 2 bucks.
3: 50 pm
I’m late. I hope I die…..along with Bud.
4:10 pm
I finally find a street I recognize. I hit the gas. Right in front of a cop.
4:28 pm
Cop lets me go. His name was Steve. Thanks Steve.
4:45 pm
I make it to the office…an hour late.
Moral to this story: Who gives a shit. Sometimes life just throws it at your face. Walk it off!
FU
1. If you are in a hurry, you will never get there on time.
2. If you are not in a hurry, you could run naked down the highway, and not as much as a retard on a scooter would cross your path.
3. Nobody has ever made it somewhere in 30 minutes…….ever.
4. If you are in a hurry, and you have to get there in 30 minutes….please refer back to #1.
3:15 pm
I just left an appointment, MAX- six miles away from work. I HAD to be back by 3:45 pm so that I could make a meeting with my boss. A meeting I knew was about how I was not getting things done in a proficient matter.
Let the games begin.
3:19 pm
I get on the highway –after being stuck on the side street for dramatically too long. Why is it that every time you see a line of orange cones….it leads to four or five guys by a truck….eating sandwiches? I don’t care if it’s three in the morning! Sandwiches OUT!!
3:24 pm
I have been cut off in the middle lane THREE TIMES! I missed my exit. Just cant get right. Maybe there is a bar at the next one.
3:33 pm
I end up going down a one way street I have never been on. For anyone who knows, this is the most terrifying experience known to man. I can now see my building to the right…but have no fucking clue how to get there.
3:39 pm
I turn right down an alley. I meet a man named Bud, who gives me directions down an adjoining alley. It cost me 2 bucks.
3:43 pm
My boss calls:
Boss: Where are you?
Me: Somewhere south of downtown.
Boss: How did you get there?
Me: I listened to Bud.
Boss: Who’s Bud?
Me: A guy with 2 bucks.
3: 50 pm
I’m late. I hope I die…..along with Bud.
4:10 pm
I finally find a street I recognize. I hit the gas. Right in front of a cop.
4:28 pm
Cop lets me go. His name was Steve. Thanks Steve.
4:45 pm
I make it to the office…an hour late.
Moral to this story: Who gives a shit. Sometimes life just throws it at your face. Walk it off!
FU
posted by Frank Upton at 7:24 PM
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